A man is playing the piano softly one night in a downtown bar.
In walks an elephant. The elephant walks over to the pianist, and suddenly starts to cry.
"There, there", says the pianist "Do you recognize the song?"
"No, no," says the elephant "I recognize the keys."
Dracula met Frankenstein in the street one day.
Drackie says to Frankie "You know, you're better than all my friends put together.......
Come to think of it, you ARE all my friends put together!"
If e-mail was a city, you would live in a place where no two people had the same name.
A Mother decided that her 10-year-old daughter should get something 'practical' for her birthday.
"Suppose we open a savings account for you?" the mother suggested.
Her daughter was delighted.
"It's your account, darling," the mother said as they arrived at the bank, "so you fill out the application."
Her daughter was doing fine filling out the application until she came to the entry for 'Name of your former bank'
After a slight hesitation, she wrote down 'Piggy.'
What computer error messages really mean...
The Web site you seek cannot be located,
but countless more exist.
Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on. You ask far too much.
Windows crashed. I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one can hear your screams.
Yesterday it worked. Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.
Three things are certain: Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.
Out of memory. We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.
Serious error. All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
Offline
All I can do...no words
An eight year old girl was reading the back of a lemon juice bottle while she was eating dinner with her family.
Noting that the bottle said that it was "not made from concentrate" she asked her Father what that meant.
He told her that it was made from distracted lemons.
While her Mother shook her head in disbelief,
the little girl said,
"That must be why they got caught."